Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001)
|"The Power of Christ IMPALES You!"|
I went to my friend's Halloween party last night, and somehow this movie got brought up. We decided that it was life-threateningly important that we find the movie and watch it. Surprisingly, it is on Netflix.
How is the overall quality?
|Jesus and his hot bitches? Look at the amazing image|
quality! Also this was part of a musical number!
How are the plot and the characters?
Awful and awful, to sum it up nicely. In all honesty, I got distracted around the time the luchador showed up, so I can't give a very good review of the full plot, but from what I saw, the plot was pretty bad. The vampires want to kill Jesus for some reason and they are also hunting lesbians. Why lesbians? I don't know. In any case, Jesus is a kung-fu master, and he kicks major vampire butt. He doesn't really have a personality, but I think expecting that would be holding this movie to too high of standards. Also appearing in the movie is Mary Magnum, who's only defining feature is a shiny red jumpsuit.
Is it so bad it’s good?
Yes. Very much yes. I haven not seen a movie so terrible in a long time, if ever! I don't know if I could actually sit down and watch the entire thing without a big group (and beer!) to make fun of it with. The dubbing would probably drive me crazy.
So would you watch it again?
Probably not. It’s worth the watch if you are in the mood for god-awful movies, but I certainly don't want to watch it again. I don't even know if I want to finish it!